One of those phone calls you hate

I just got inside after a lovley trip to Gothenburg... Ice latte , sushi and some shopping.

When my mother called me...

Grandfather was ill...very ill.

The nurses thought he would past away soon...

Fuck.

My grandfather is my idol, he is the one who teached me fishing, drinking and play poker.

I dont want him to die...

Even though, he is 95 years old.. a few more weeks and he be 96.

He has been sick for some weeks now..and always recogniced me when I had visit him.

Hold my hand, smiled at me.

Now I just cry.

I pray to God that it wont be to late, I will go there after work tomorrow.

How can I do that, hold his hands, smile at him..tell him I love him..With the knowledge that it is probably is the last time I ever see him.

A small part of me want him to past away...to find peace and calm.

I dont want him to have any pain.

He had a good life, he has been married to my grandmother for 64 years and had a lot of love and laugher.

The other part of me wants him to be healthy again, like when I was just a little girl, play with me, let me sit in his knee.

Of course this will never happend.

All lifes has an ending and I guess his is about to end...

I just hope I get the chance to say good bye.

Jag älskar Dig Morfar!